Forgiveness; the Door to Freedom

The other day one of my friends pointed out something to me that was a bit shocking. We were in a workout, and he asked if we could talk afterward. Of course, I said yes, as my interest was piqued.

What came next was hard to hear, but it was exactly what I needed. He mentioned that in our workouts lately I seemed very negative and that some of the comments I was making were causing him to feel unmotivated.

He then proceeded to tell me that he comes to my house to blow off steam and let go of his daily stressors, and what I was commenting on was creating more stress for him.

Now, 99.5% of the time, I’m a fairly positive guy, but sometimes I can be someone who goes down the negativity and hatred hole. I am only human after all….!

Usually these negative thought cycles are triggered by something I see on the news, or read about with regards to the state of our nation.

His words really struck a chord with me, so of course I apologized and realized that I needed to check my bad attitude at the door.

After this much-needed AND appreciated conversation, it got me to thinking about the landscape of hatred in today's world. It seems like everywhere we turn, there's negativity, anger, and division. It’s gotten even worse since the pandemic.

I don’t want to get too far in the weeds here, but something (or a lot) needs to change, and I believe that in the face of hatred and negativity, forgiveness is our most powerful weapon.

Life is a journey, and just like we work on our bodies in the gym, we need to work on our minds and spirits to navigate this often tumultuous terrain. Hatred and negativity can be like a storm that clouds our judgment and hinders our progress.

So, how do we clear the skies and find a path to peace? That's where forgiveness comes in.

Understanding the Landscape:

In our world today, it's easy to get caught up in the whirlwind of hatred. Whether it's political differences, social issues, or personal conflicts, negativity seems to be everywhere. It's like trying to climb a mountain with a backpack full of rocks – it's not easy, and it slows us down.

But guess what? We have the power to shed that weight. Forgiveness is the key that unlocks the door to a lighter, more fulfilling life; it sets us free. It doesn't mean condoning actions or pretending like nothing happened. Instead, it's about freeing ourselves from the burden of holding onto anger and resentment.

The Power of Forgiveness:

Forgiveness is not a sign of weakness; it's a demonstration of strength. When we forgive, we release the grip that hatred has on our hearts. It's like doing a mental cleanse – wiping the slate clean and giving ourselves the opportunity to grow.

I often say that fitness is a journey, not a destination. The same goes for forgiveness. It's a process, and it takes time. Start by acknowledging the pain, the hurt, and the anger. Then, make a conscious decision to let it go. It's not about forgetting; it's about choosing not to be defined by the negativity.

Applying Forgiveness in Everyday Life:

1. Reflect on Your Feelings: Take a moment to reflect on the emotions that are holding you back. Is it resentment, anger, or frustration? Acknowledge these feelings without judgment. It’s human to have these feelings, and when they start to take over our lives, that’s when we need to take a deeper look at what’s really going on.

2. Choose Forgiveness: Understand that forgiveness is a choice you make for yourself, not for the other person. Decide to let go of the negative emotions that are weighing you down.

3. Practice Empathy: Try to see things from the other person's perspective. This doesn't mean you have to agree with them, but understanding their point of view can help foster empathy.

4. Set Boundaries: Forgiveness doesn't mean you have to invite negativity back into your life. Set healthy boundaries to protect yourself while still letting go of the emotional baggage.

5. Focus on Self-Care: Just like we nourish our bodies with exercise and healthy food, nourish your spirit with self-care. Surround yourself with positivity, engage in activities you love, and cultivate a supportive environment.

Remember, forgiveness is a gift you give to yourself. It's about reclaiming your power and choosing love over hatred. As we navigate this landscape of negativity, let's be the light that cuts through the darkness. Together, we can create a world where forgiveness and understanding lead the way.

Less is more

Recognizing the Value of Knowing When to Back Off 

How do you deal with life’s inevitable twists and turns? 

You know what I’m talking about.

You’re trapped in the airport because your flight gets delayed five hours. Three days before the 10k you trained for all summer, you pull a calf muscle. Your kid goes all Will Smith on a bully and suddenly you’re spending the afternoon dealing with grade school administrators.  

Like John Lennon said, “Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans.”

There’s no avoiding the occasional set back, but you can avoid letting setbacks get you down.

How, you ask?

Be flexible. 

Change is inevitable and our ability to be flexible when change happens will make a YUGE difference in our growth, not just in fitness, but with every aspect of our lives.

This week, I offer you four flexibility tips to help at home, in the gym, in the office, in the airport, or in the principal’s office. 

Flexibility Tip #1: 

Stretch! I can’t overemphasize the importance of warm-up stretches. Give careful attention to the specific muscle groups you will be emphasizing. It’s one of the best ways to avoid injury. For help with this, check out my Whole Body Stretch Routine.

Flexibility Tip #2: 

Stretch! Wait a minute! Isn’t that Tip #1? Yes, but I’m talking about a different application here. Next time life throws you a curveball, hit the pause button. Take a moment to stretch your shoulders, your back, or wherever you manifest stress. I promise you’ll come back to the situation with a clearer head.

Flexibility Tip #3: 

Don’t take life too seriously! Sometimes finding the humor in the change of plans gets our focus OFF of the inconvenience and ON to what we need to do to fix it. Flight delayed? Take a breath and smile at the airline customer service person who just gave you the bad news. They’ll be a lot more inclined to go the extra mile—and maybe a comp meal—for a friendly face.                                

Flexibility Tip #4: 

Have a back-up plan! We all have activities we swear we’ll do as soon as we have more time, like learning to juggle, reading a big novel, learning to juggle big novels—it’s up to you. The great thing about unexpected changes is that they sometimes free you up to do other things, so be ready with your contingency activity.

Stay Flexible my friend!